To the tall stool I hobble, as I motion for a double
Of a heavy-bottomed glass stocked with gin
Then I heard a lullaby in a tune that got me high
Asking if I'd like a dash of something in
Taken back for a minute, I replied "Please nothing in it
Just a few cubes so I can cool it down
And can I open up a tab, give some credit to this lad
I like the scenery so I will stick around"
And I fell in love with the barmaid
And she, she turned me down again
And I'll listen to your sweet songs until the end of the day
And I'll camp out here on the pinewood till she sends me away
Paint a picture of our livers made of soot and sun-dried leather
How much destruction can one more whisky do?
We're just here taking shelter from bad news and stormy weather
More than enough supplies for me and you
Spend that paycheck on that single malt, our failures are our parents' fault
Tell me of the conquests of your past
And if you have nothing left to share, lend your ear or lend a pair
Lend a smile, a laugh, a toast or raise your glass
Cause we fell in love with the barmaid
And she, she turned us down again
And we'll listen to your sweet songs until the end of the day
And we'll camp out here on the pinewood till she sends us away