Been trying to keep my head up But honestly I'm fed up Surrounded by a cloud and I ain't talking about the weather See I have to hold it down I crawled up off the ground But I ain't even happy even when I got the crown So they ask about depression Don't want another session It wasn't me who did it but I guess I learnt the lesson See I don't feel a thing 'Cause honestly I'm numb I thought you'd live forever and I know that Sounds dumb But I'm drowning in the love And I can tell it's fake 'Cause loss brings lies and trauma brings snakes And a lot of true colours I hope you didn't suffer And I know you didn't mean it but you left me in the gutter Now I don't know what to do The fuck I'm supposed to say The story stays the same 'Cause I didn't see a face 'Cause all I saw was smoke, I couldn't scream I choked I dropped down to my knees kinda which I hadn't woke Now I feel reckless Weak under pressure It's like I got a death wish And I know that's selfish I'm tired of the pain There's no one here to blame And life goes on but it'll never be the same Give a fuck about sleeping You ain't even breathing We could've had it all, it was you I believed in Give a f about sleeping You ain't even breathing We couldn't had it all, it was you I believed in Now I feel reckless Weak under pressure Its like I got a death wish And I know that's selfish I'm tired of the pain There's no one here to blame And life goes on but it'll never be the same So now I feel reckless Weak under pressure It's like I've got a death wish And I know that's selfish I'm tired of the pain There's no one here to blame And life goes on but it'll never be the same I told you slow down 'Cause they ain't even on you I wish you would've listened when I saw it, I could've stopped you You were so stubborn A fighter not a lover I can't talk about the past 'cause when I try, I stop stutter But what about the future 'Cause I don't think I want one It's true what they say you know love when you've lost them But what about the future 'Cause I don't think I want one It's true what they you know love when you've lost them But, just look up to the skies what they telling me? But it ain't fair that all I'm left with is memories So fuck therapy I put it in a melody I promise I won't stop until I built you a legacy Just look up to the skies what they telling me But I don't care about the envy or the empathy I cling to what we had so desperately I made you a promise that I'll build you a legacy Now I feel reckless, weak under pressure It's like I've got a death wish And I know that's selfish I'm tired of the pain There's no one here to blame And life goes on but it'll never be the same Give a fuck about sleeping You ain't even breathing We could've had it all, it was you that I believed in Give a fuck about sleeping You ain't even breathing We could've had it all, it was you that I believed in Now I feel reckless Weak under pressure It's like I've got a death wish And I know that's selfish I'm tired of the pain There's no one here to blame And life goes on but it'll never be the same So now I feel reckless Weak under pressure It's like I've got a death wish And I know that's selfish I'm tired of the pain There's no one here to blame And life goes on but it'll never be the same