Oh if I were President I'd make you realize No more question's no more lies I'll tell you the truth looking in your eyes If I were President. Well first and formost son Jesus Christ is the only one You're gonna talk to when your day begins I'm gonna pass the law that says everyday You gotta get down on your knees and pray Thank a man for dyin for you sins. If I were president I'd make you understand Jesus is the man he's the reason that you stand If I were president. We're gonna put the word out on the street No more Washington D.C., I'm gonna make this country big and strong No more payin up your taxes The capitol's in Fort Worth, Texas; That's the only place a house that big belongs If I were president Nobody's gonna push us around, Well nobody's gonna laugh when Jason Volet's my chief of staff If I were president. Well Iraqi boys you must be nuts Your diggin yourself deeper in a rut I got a way to end you problems soon Well we'll bring home every one of our boys Pull out our biggest baddest toys And blow you crazy bastards to the moon. If I were president, Nobody's gonna push us around If they threaten us or put us down We'll burn their country to the ground, If I were president. Well talk about you Osama bin Laden It won't be long till your name's forgotten America's freedom is always gonna ring And you know that we wont be satisfied Till your hatred's dead and your people are fried Your head's on a pole and your balls in a sling. If I were president If I were president Hey one thing you can't deny Your sorry ass is gonna die If I was president Well I got one for you, Saddam Hussein We'll resurect General John Wayne, And put together a very simple plan, We'll put down our 'nukes put down our guns And you and the Duke 'ul be 1-on-1 And he'll kick your ass if you were a man. If I were president If I were president If you don't like Willie Nelson You gotta go to prision If I were president So cashible and make it me an' if I win the beer's free If I were president.