Don't be a dick! As a kid I liked the Beatles And then Styx and ELO Roller skated backwards to disco, Ass kicked cuz my school book said Devo I learned of crosstown rivals When a car of massive jocks Asked what school I attended, And then pelted me with rocks I poured sugar in their gas tank The proud Mustang got so sick That day we learned a lesson... Don't be a dick! Studied history and religion In the schools where I was punched My funny hair deeply offended, A delinquent fought me for my lunch And all the books and bibles, Social theory and explanation Can be summed up in a minute: Aggression triggers escalation No one likes to be assaulted Getting poked with a burning stick Unless you got permission... Don't be a dick! You can call it your special golden rule, Or common consideration You can call it manners or etiquette Or make a scientific explanation But it all boils down to kindness, Or at least not being a meanie And if you don't understand that You might be a giant weenie! Don't be a dick! From the alleys of Barcelona To the New York City gutters From the Tokyo elevators To London bikes ridden by nutters I've rocked with millions of diverse people, Big to small and fancy to plain Under skin and clothes and hardware More or less we're all the same Please forgive me for this lecture, But 50 years taught me this trick If you want to make life better... Don't be a dick!