There is a story we used to tell
'Bout the picture in the moonlight that we knew so well
A house of grief photographed
But Vi and I, how we laughed
On that final night, we sat at her bed foot
Old roommates together again
She, a fresh new widow
Me, I'd no way with men
Her room, it was bookless, quiet and bare
Except for that single picture there
A picture of the old house
Tall and dark against the sky
There, in the new house
I said, "Tell me all about it, Vi"
She told the story we used to tell
'Bout her people and the old place, back when life was hell
Granddad's right there, wand'ring daft (he's wand'ring daft)
But Vi and I, we just laughed
Vi had vanished when I woke the next morning
No sign of my friend in her room
Called her lawyer, called the police
They guessed Vi had met her doom
I couldn't take that, it didn't make sense
Vi and I dreamed in the future tense
I crawled into her bed
Beneath the fat, lopsided moon
The picture hung above me
And that's when I could hear it
Her tune
She sang the story we used to tell (Ahh)
So enraptured, she'd been captured by the picture's spell
Vi trapped inside by a witch's craft (a witch's craft)
Right through the frame came a draft
I struck the glass
But it pulled me in
Inside the picture
The old house was damp
Then came her granddad
All crusty, all camp
Half-waltzing along
With a glittering grin
"Oh, just in time," he cried
"For the ball to begin!"
The ball
The ball
There were no musicians
Just the old man and his hag
They danced and shook like maniacs
Calling Vi and I a drag
He stabbed us with his icy hand
Slobbering his one command
"Dance!"
"Dance!"
So we danced
And we danced
Vi said she'd been there too many years
Every night a ball, and choked, gasping tears
The old ones were her people, stuck in the frame
"I love you," I told her
She said, "I'm sorry you came"
That decided us, and we made a plan
We had to be clever and quick
Vi says she doesn't remember
'Cause, like me, it makes her sick
Each with a pillow, we smothered the pair
And buried them out back in the summer air
We don't know if they're dead
But we do know that they're gone
And still we wait by the old front gate (still we wait for)
For someone brave to see us out on the lawn
Trapped in the story we used to tell (we used to tell)
In the picture under moonlight that we knew so well
Somewhere our graves are epitaphed (they're epitaphed)
But Vi and I, we just laugh
Forever
Vi and I, we just laugh
Haa
Haa
Haa