The day I stopped wearing tracksuits
And became a gent
Was when I got turned down from my local drinking establishment
I had my best tracksuit on
And my best hat to date
I walked up to the bouncer
Sorry not tonight mate
He had a big bushy beard
And a mop on top
He looked like what you'd get if you bred a wookie with an ewok
I wondered if he'd change his mind
But bouncers rarely did
I was getting turned down by Chewbaccas kid
I'm diplomatic, I speak a language he can understand
(Grrrr)
He looked shocked
Walkie-talkie in hand
And then radioed through
The tracksuited man is to recieved a lifetime ban
He said you better leave now mate, or I'm gonna' use force
I don't fuck with Jedi
So I left of course
Tracksuit racism
I was at the brunt
But I gotta' admit though,
I did look like a...
You've been tooting the devils danduff
With your debit card
Now you're permanently handcuffed
To the man
With the red skin
With the horns on his head
And the goatee hanging off his skin
You've been tooting the devils dandruff
Makes a tough man feel so much more tougher
Makes a tough man feel so much more rougher
If you're sane, you'll turn in to a nutter
Used to be such a sweet boy
Predicted A's he was employed
But then it all went a bit Pete Tong
First came the spliff
And then came the bong
Became the E's
Followed by the coke
There goes the job
And now sweet boy's broke
A couple of beers becomes a (...)
(...)
Suddenly everyones got a cold
He was shy if they're gonna go
And he got bold
Good old (...) wants to retire inside
Now he's talking shite
And he know's he right because
You've been tooting the devils danduff
With your debit card
Now you're permanently handcuffed
To the man
With the red skin
With the horns on his head
And the goatee hanging off his skin