Professor Night haunts a bar Where he says that there are Two chicks for every guy He says hi and gets laid He's got it made And he hardly has to try And they don't put up a fight With Professor Night Oh no they don't put up a fight With Professor Night Meet Professor Night Professor Night has a flair Combs his hair with something The barber recommends He blends right in and takes control He really plays the role At least he tries with all his might And they don't put up a fight With Professor Night Oh no they don't put up a fight With Professor Night Meet Professor Night He's the Professor Professor Night He's the Professor He professed the night He's got a million lies on top Got to keep the ladies happy He says anything that makes the river flow Is good to know Professor Night Professor Night has no love And a driving glove won't keep you warm When the storm comes down Pound for pound he's a loser A destroyer not a cruiser Johnny on the spot not mister right And they don't put up a fight With Professor Night Oh no they don't put up a fight With Professor Night Meet Professor Night