Lose our morals each December Promise each year will be better All our good intentions Forgotten like a extra Bottle of Lynx shower gel That I didn't even ask for and Auntie Val's given me again Relatives come out the woodworks Carol singers make my head hurt Death by cringe John Lewis advert At Christmas 'Tis the magic is fading Everybody gets wasted At Christmas When you're crying to slade With your sad tinder date At the annual office party We're all just desperate, aren't we? At Christmas (At Christmas) Granny's tipsy on the good wine We're all arguing by lunchtime Call me ungrateful I got a mug from James That looks suspiciously like the one that we gave him last year What a joke Relatives come out the woodworks Carol singers make my head hurt Death by cringe John Lewis advert At Christmas 'Tis the magic is fading Everybody gets wasted At Christmas When you're crying to slade With your sad tinder date At the annual office party We're all just desperate, aren't we? At Christmas (At Christmas) Dead mistletoe Scrap in Tesco Dad burnt the roast Bad cracker joke Omnibus soaps Mince pies are gross All of our hopes, lost in the post Transport is a no-go Bought my presents from the Esso Merry merry merry merry Christmas Here's some antifreeze and chocolate biscuits You shouldn't have! You actually shouldn't have At Christmas 'Tis the magic is fading Everybody gets wasted At Christmas When you're crying to slade With your sad tinder date At the annual office party We're all just desperate, aren't we? At Christmas (At Christmas) At Christmas