Pick me apart like it's an operation We're back and forth but we ain't conversating Not getting younger I forgot I'm aging Yo, look 'Cause I know life, I know the struggles of surviving I grew up in London where we share the same address But we're divided, these ain't tears man I just hide behind these eyelids And out of everybody I've met my fucking cabbie's still the wisest He said money isn't everything, only thing you need is good friends Four walls and a roof that you can settle in You'll soon be onto better things, but he doesn't know About the debt I'm in or when I took out uni loans for ketamine but I'm working hard but what's the meaning Heard the more you sweat and practice Then they lessen what you bleeding Why am I working like a slave but my rewards are less appealing Are these TED talks that I'm watching all deceiving, is it true? Heard the only person standing between victory is you I know the feeling when you're talented but don't know what to do And everybody's doing well and you don't know which path to choose It's like they've never worked a day But told you mountains you should move It's really peak out here, feeling weak out here Nine to five and five to nine, ain't got no sleep out here Tryna blossom every day, I'm planting seeds out here I'm buying all these fucking flowers looking bleak out here But I know, there's something waiting for me ooh 'Cause I've been chasing my dreams, I know And I've been wasting this weed Why am I high, why am I high all the time All the time, on my mind, every night Why am I high, why am I high all the time All the time, on my mind, every night I'm in a smokey room on Christmas eve Anxiety keeps creeping, I can't think of happy thoughts I've taken hella L's this evening and my marj don't say a word It's been a year and we ain't speakin' I can't tell you 'bout the mental state I've been in All I've seen mandem, pass away or go in there Somehow I haven't noticed yet If God had really cared he would've wrote a cheque But I ain't losing focus yet tryna make sure 2020's patterned 'Cause I'm nineteen, my dreams were feeling shattered Mind's been scattered I was lost, I got the sack from work Thinking should I bag a work Mandem think my questions are a tad absurd They're saying fam you haven't learned Clocked you're always broke when you go back to work I know I hate to say it bro but trapping works in me I'm just blessed that I'm alive and well He wants me on the line I said I might as well could do with extra money from his clientele Still writing and I'm firing on the mic as well Think I'm gonna blow up from what I can tell This Cali pack a light that smell So now I'm rolling thirty-three and lil' zoots to ration I should really hit the line but I don't really suit the fashion I've been saying it for years, if you got dreams then go and catch 'em But all these trappers, all these bankers If the government could tax 'em Now I'm staring at these tickets and it's getting me frustrated I spent all those years at school and now those years are being wasted You know laws are all in place 'cause they know people have to break it 'Cause they all just turn our backs on us and left us all to face it so Why am I high, why am I high all the time All the time, on my mind, every night Why am I high, why am I high all the time All the time, on my mind, every night