Yo, he collects dogs, and might dress them in kimonos Drink sake at the bus stop like a hobo Pick little phillip all the prettiest roses Too much banana in your dog? nathan exploded He's into furniture making and jujitsu So find a stick of furniture and he might hit you Or fill your house with some wolf spider babies After he's finished dressing up like a lady It's samurai dave! The badass-est baddest samurai Never to be an actual samurai It's samurai dave! He can fit through the nostril of the buddha, man It's crazy, get a camera guy But even samurais need a little break time So they can snack on some ostrich and snake wine He's a generous man as far as food goes He'll even buy a sandwich for some colorful rogues But no cucumber! and no watermelon! Dave doesn't like them, and whatever else you're selling He's just gonna order various pig parts Oh so delicious pig lungs and pig hearts A big lung problem beset him once in japan He got flirted with by the girl nurses and a man who brought him manga As they took his chest and just stabbed it No anesthetic required, he's just a rabbit So now he's got these crazy scars But it's hard, you have to travel that far If you wanna eat a bee larva, Or drink sake-in-a-jar After wandering the streets at 2am to find the perfect bar Though if he's been there before, he can do it with ease Drawn by the scents of ale, no lager please But maybe curry with cheese, everything with cheese It's in my teeth like teriyaki cricket knees It's samurai dave! The badass-est baddest samurai Never to be an actual samurai It's samurai dave! He's a serious man with a serious dog And he's got a sick battle cry He likes swords, he plays with swords He collects swords, he makes some swords Swords out of wood, swords out of metal Little bits of chair, maybe a bike pedal Real swords! pool noodles, not daggers Round 1, flash-stepper vs. corpse dragger And i know where i'm a place my bet Have you seen dave's ninja moves? he's like a war vet He jumps really high, he was in a circus troupe He can jump even better than he makes a lettuce soup He can climb and swing, he's got talents Leap over anything, just give him a challenge It's samurai dave! The badass-est baddest samurai Never to be an actual samurai It's samurai dave! He can fit through the nostril of the buddha, man It's crazy, get a camera guy It's samurai dave! The badass-est baddest samurai Never to be an actual samurai It's samurai dave! He's a serious man with a serious dog Or at least he can fantasize