There once was a man An evil, evil man Who lived his life in evil, evil ways In a big crooked house Circled by big crooked trees There he savored all his evil deeds "You see I'm good" he cried "So very deep inside" "Deep down inside I'm good" "I just keep my good side" "Buried deep beneath my hide" "So I enjoy my evil, evil ways" This morning on a snowy street A starving man fed his mutt And our hero felt a twinge within his heart And that beggar on the street Felt a gnawing in his gut But our hero had the sense to soon depart "You see I'm good" he cried "So very deep inside" "Deep down inside I'm good" "I just keep my good side" "Buried deep beneath my hide" "So I enjoy my evil, evil ways" Toasted his own health Just last Tuesday night For feeling a very real regret For his new investment: a factory and it makes Dog food out of orphans long lost pets "You see I'm good" he cried "So very deep inside" "Deep down inside I'm good" "I just keep my good side" "Buried deep beneath my hide" "So I enjoy my evil, evil ways" There once was a man An evil, evil man Who lived his life in evil, evil ways In a big crooked house Circled by big crooked trees