I think I know that voice It came to me in my sleep Narrating failures Painted watercolours flesh out the scenes If this is only a dream I've just myself to blame I could be anything so why am I still fucking ashamed I never needed you more Than when my hands start to shake Endlessly drifting and I know I'll never wake up the same I hear it in your tone But can't recall if you'd say I shouldn't need another reason from somebody to stay Maybe it's all in my head Maybe none of this is real I've been picking at scabs I desperately need to heal I've been living a lie And I'm in too deep today I could be anything so why am I still fucking ashamed I could be anything so why am I still fucking ashamed If I could love anything More than I hate myself I think I could accept Maybe all I need is some help I'm a coward at heart Always pushing away Shouldn't need another reason from somebody to stay I could do nothing but sit and shake for hours With the kind of self-loathing that stings in the shower Pushing perceptions pills will prevent this pain from my head Mistaking empathy for pity It's just my life I'm taking Now my flowers a wilting Can't find the sun Fed by only the knowledge that I'm no good to anyone Poison lingers on every breath It's all that I know and it scares me to death